RELATIONSHIPS!!!

One thing I have strongly learnt though in the last 6 months is the importance our relationships play in our lives. I realise life is all about our relationships with one another. I have always been one to live and think independently and not really appreciate the people around me. (Don’t get me wrong I love you all, just seeing you with new, more loving eyesJ). 

But now more than ever I am so grateful for my family, friends, acquaintances and even enemies.

I think about my relationships thus far, (some have blossomed, some hit the rocks, some experienced major shakes but thank fully bounced back) and I thank God for the wonderful people God has blessed me with. We can have all the material things in the world but they can never satisfy like our relationships. 

What’s the point living in a 5 bedroom flat alone, or having 3 cars only you drive or making all the money and having no one to share it with? Imagine having a phone with no one to call, a blackberry with no one to chat with, a face book page with no friend list, and a twitter account with no followers... I CANNOT OVEREMPHASIZE THE IMPORTANCE OF OUR RELATIONSHIPS.

“Each of us is defined, and enriched, by our relationships with others.  It's the strength of our relationships, the warmth of our friendships, the time we have with our partners, parents and children, the respect we're given in the workplace and by our peers, the achievements we forge collaboratively and collectively, which generate real happiness and fulfilment."  

Michael Gove, Member of UK Parliament 

To nurture a relationship with anyone (father, mother, siblings, spouse, friends, etc) is hard work. Sometimes we say I just don’t get along with that person, the question is have you tried to get along. In relationships our words play a very important role. What we say to one another especially when we are angry can have far reaching consequences. (I am guilty of this, when I’m upset I say all sorts of things sometimes just to spite the other person, sometimes cos am not thinking straight.)

Also how quick are you to forgive? The popular saying goes to “err is human to forgive is divine”...easier said than done I hear some of you saying, yeah I know. Sometimes it takes me months to truly forgive and forget the wrong someone has done to me?

What of our actions? Are you there for the people in your life, are you reliable, caring, giving, and helping? Can your family or friends boast about you? It’s important that your actions speak for themselves. Some have all the good words to say, but their actions can’t correspond with the words.

All in all, the most important relationship we should have and nurture is our relationship with God. Develop an affection and  commitment to him that cannot be compared to anyone or anything. It is my desire that my relationship with him grows every day, and as that happens I know I will also learn to develop better relationships with all other people, and be at peace even with my enemies (Prov 16:7)

Love you all

TyF

30th June, 2011

"NYSC 5": Kidnapped Corpers

Last week, 7th June 2011 the news broke (ok well not exactly “broke” because it wasn’t all over the airwaves) that  5 Corp. members serving in Rivers State had been kidnapped. Infact, I first saw this as a friends black berry status and I asked him if it was true. My ever inquisitive and fact seeking mind immediately "googled" to get more information, only to find, as at that time, there was nothing on any news medium about it.

I immediately buzzed my friend back, relating my findings and was rather skeptical as to the truth of the story. It wasn’t until the next day, 8th June, about evening time that some news started filtering in about the kidnap, and I wondered why there seemed to be no media raze over the situation.

Let’s examine this, five young people, who in the process of serving their fatherland have been kidnapped so that they become money making ventures for the abductors. It is no longer news that kidnapping has become the latest money making business in town. Everyone is a potential victim, both the rich, poor, broke, young, old etc. I recently spoke with a barber, whose wife happens to be a hairdresser and they recounted how their four year old child was kidnapped in Obalende, and they had to pay a N50, 000 ransom. By that time the child had been taken to somewhere in Sango Otta. I was in shock when I heard the story, so much is happening that does not get into the main stream media, and while we think this happens only to those who can afford millions and billions it’s now happening to those who might not even have thousands to pay as ransom.

However the news of these 5 corpers is just scary. First the Rivers State government has said they will not pay the 20million ransom requested by the kidnappers for each corper which makes a total of 100million. The rationale behind this is that the kidnappers would then take that advantage, assuming the government will pay for every kidnapped corper and will then continue the trend. Governor Amaechi, we are not asking you to pay the ransom, as we understand the implication, all we ask is fish out the kidnappers and rescue the innocent young citizens. 

It is interesting that the Federal Government, who these corpers are working for, has not said anything about the situation. The NYSC in Rivers state has not even officially released the identity of the four female corpers that were taken. Besides Olumide Yusuf who is the only kidnapped male, we don’t know who the others are. What exactly is the secrecy all about, if I had a child serving in that part of the state, who for some reason I have not been able to contact in days, it’s enough to freak me out wondering if my child is part of the kidnapped.

I would recall that last year July when the Four Journalists were kidnapped, the media was ablaze with the news until they were rescued. Why is this different, where are the newspaper headlines, Television interviews, radio comments etc???

Another issue of course if the fact that there are 4 females involved, as females anything can be done to them in the hands of the kidnappers. Olumide the only male amongst them happens to be the only son of his widowed mother, who is a 10 year retired civil servant. I cannot but wonder what she is going through right now. It is reported that Olumide and the other 4 are batch B corp members who are meant to be passing out on Thursday 16th June, which is 2 days from now. This just makes the whole situation annoying. In 2 days from now, they would have succesfully completed their service and returned home to their families to begin a new phase of their lives. 

Today they are kidnap victims who cannot be found.

The situation is just pathetic and I can only empathise with the families of all those involved in this saga.May God keep the corpers and I pray for their quick and safe release. May God keep us all and cover us from evil that lurks around.

The Y-Count group is organising a rally for the release of these corpers. Check ycount@groups.facebook.com for more details. 

To read Olumides Mothers interview on the situation, check http://weekly.dailytrust.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=6269%3Amother-cries-out-ive-no-money-so-nysc-must-produce-my-only-son&catid=40%3Acover-stories&Itemid=26#.TfOHXozJPYU;facebook

Stay Safe

TyF

14/6/11

Dream Big, ACT BIGGER!!!

It is official! Life belongs to those who dream big, who desire to achieve feats beyond their wildest imagination and most importantly who take steps in achieving their dreams. Oh yes we all have dreams, whether they are day dreams or night dreams, we all dream. We dream of a better life, a better job, a deeper relationship with God, more money, achieving purpose, and yes the little things as well, but am talking about the "seemingly" big dreams. Those desires that almost make your mind dizzy just thinking about them.

I have learnt that dreaming is just the first step to achieving your desire. Dreams without corresponding action will produce no results, just as the bible says Faith without works is dead (James 2:17). Your desires create a corresponding action within you, the more you meditate on your dreams, you find out you start receiving inspiration on different things you can do to achieve that dream. Inspiration is meant to be acted upon and not dreamt upon again.

At different points in my life I have dreamt more than acted, and yes of course nothing happened. But when I think of the times I dreamt and acted, I am awed at the results I received. Infact, in two instances where the dreams seemed impossible because what I desired was occupied, I literally saw doors open and the occupied became vacant waiting just for me.

Right now I HAVE A DREAM...(Imagine the voice of Martin Luther KingJ) This dream is BIG. It’s a dream I have nurtured for a whillllllleeeeee and after letting out all the fear, doubt and sometimes laziness, I took the first step last month. It sure was a plunge into the deep blue sea, but it was worth it. After sometime I began to see my dream coming to life. 

This dream isn’t complete yet, but my first step has opened into the 2^nd and now into the 3^rd   step which I acted on today. while I haven’t seen the end of my dream, just seeing the life coming out of it gives me hope and right now am ready to take any plunge necessary even if I have to jump into Chile's Puyehue volcano.

Today we see achievers all over the world and we desire to be like them. Trust me their dreams didn’t get them there. They saw the big picture and took steps towards that picture. Sometimes the actions seemed irrelevant, sometimes they had to do crazy stuff, unusual out of the box methods that wasn’t really the norm. 

Talking about unusual, I remember watching the Obama story and thinking to myself, President Obama with his Harvard degree could have worked anywhere in Washington or Wall street where the big leagues and wanna-be presidents usually start from, however he went to the back side of Chicago to be a community organiser, who would have thought he stood a chance at the white house??? But hey today we all know who he is. I strongly believe that choice he made that seemed different and crazy to most people at the time is instrumental in his becoming the 1st Black- American President today.

So what are the actions you need to take in achieving dream of yours, it’s time to step out, a little here, a little there. It’s time to Dream Big and ACT BIGGER!!!

Oh yes before I forget, my dream is surely gonna be completed as I continue to act on it, and as always pray about it. I promise to let you know when that happens.

Have fun Dreaming and Acting

TyF

13/6/11

"A Beautiful Day" By India Arie

A Beautiful Day

Just as i was pondering the complexities of life, I stumbled on this song by India Arie called Its a beautiful day. The lyrics capture my thoughts and i thought to share:

"Life is a journey, Not a destination, 
There are no mistakes, Just chances you’ve taken 
Lay down your regrets cause all you have is now 

Wake up in the morning, and get out of bed 
Start making a mental list in your head 
Of all of the things that you should be  grateful for 

Early in the morning It’s the dawn of a new day 
New hopes new dreams new ways 
open up your eyes, and open up my mind
and wonder how life will surprise you today 
open up your heart and decide to do your part and 
Make this a positively beautiful day 

Life is a challenge, not a competition 
You can still smell the roses and be on a mission 
Just take a moment to get in touch with your heart 

Sometimes you feel like you’ve got something to prove 
Remind yourself that there’s only one you 
Just take a moment to give thanks of who you are

 Let’s make this a wonderful, powerful, Beautiful Day 
because it truly is a Beautiful Day"

Lyrics have been modified by me

Everyday is a beautiful day, regardless of what the day presents to you. Your responses always determine the outcome of your life, not the circumstances that you face. 

Choose to live, choose to be grateful, choose to see the best even in the worst of situations.

Have a beautiful day

TyF

7th June, 2011.

What am I doing here?

The quest for purpose, for destiny, for that one thing that makes life all worth it, that makes you fulfilled, sometimes seem like a long windy road that never becomes straight. At 50 some wonder what was I created for??? At 15 some know this is what I was created for!!!

For those that know, serious kudos to you. For those who don’t, wow what can I say, it sure can be depressing especially if you’re at that point where you are really asking, searching, seeking, waiting....

I have been here many times, asking what am I created for??? What am I meant to be doing? There were times I was so depressed and I felt the whole world had left me behind. It got more upsetting when others looked at me and said oh how talented you are, greatness is in you blah blah blah and I would think; “Is this really me, or are they seeing something I can’t see?”

I wanted to do so much, because I felt I was gifted in many ways, but how much can you do at once is the question, how do you know what to do at the moment, how can you trust the voice within when the voices without are saying many other things, how can you believe when contrary winds are blowing, how can you start when uncertainties fill your heart and the way isn’t so clear. How, What, When, Where, Who, Why??? – the 5ws and 1h come to plague you.

Then I discovered I was thinking too much, worrying too much, planning too much, don’t get me wrong, planning is good but sometimes you just gotta do it and let the pieces fall into place by themselves. Someone once said “too much analysis leads to paralysis”, just do it: NIKEJ.

So I decided to take it one step at a time. First I listed out all that my heart desired to do (Positive things only guys). After that I placed in order of priority and of course committed it all into Gods hands. (I can’t do anything without him). You know what happened, doors started opening into the things I wanted to do. I started getting information and opportunitites started showing up on the radar. So I jumped in and waded in the water. Some worked out and are doing great now, some didn’t – and I didn’t let that get to me because am learning that it’s all about Prayer, Persistence and Passion (amongst other things).

Some days the funny thoughts still come, still many questions in my head and doubts in my heart. Fear as usual lurks at the door, envy sometimes creeps in. Insecurity rears its head, but hey it’s all part of it. I thank God for my life today and in the midst of it all, I know without a doubt it’s all working out for my good.  

So if you find yourself in this position as well, don’t despair, it’s not the end of the world, on the contrary it’s really only the beginning. The beginning of new discoveries, strengths you didn’t know you had, life as you never knew it. The road can be tough, but hey with God you can smile all the way. Just take it one day at a time, believe in yourself (that’s very important) and step out into the unknown. And remember God has to be in it with you.

Hey what’s the worst that could happen..............................................???

Have a productive and fruitful month

TyF

June 2, 2011