Tuesday, 28 January 2014

BE HOPEFUL





Do you feel like you've hit an impenetrable wall, do you feel like there is no more hope for you, or would you just like to be encouraged, inspired, motivated, stirred???
 
I saw this video and I just had to share it.
If you are a Christian reading this, its time to push out Gods Kingdom culture. So much is happening all around us. We are not made to be Christians in the church, but to be Christians to the world, to be light in the darkness, and right now i'm sure you would agree the world is getting darker.
 
Be proud of your Faith, manifest your Faith, be quick to show Love, NEVER judge or condemn. Let your words be full of Grace, seasoned with salt. Let your light so shine before all men. Let our lives glorify God. Tell someone about Jesus Today.
 
You are Blessed.
Have a most lovely day!!!
 
TyFajj 

Friday, 24 January 2014

FOLLOWING 'HIS' SIGNS


I had an interesting experience yesterday and as I thought about it, I related it to my walk with God and came up with some conclusions of mine. Hope you enjoy and learn something from this.
It was about 8pm and a friend of mine was stranded, he requested I take him home. I had no issue with that except for the fact that he lives in Apapa and it’s not a route I am very familiar with. Going won’t be tough since he would be there to guide, but I knew the coming back would be a major challenge. My final destination was the island and I didn’t have an idea of how to link the road back.  I eventually agreed to take him and figured I might just get back on Western Avenue to link the island (That’s a longer route but one that I sorta knew). After dropping him off, I began the return journey. The night seemed darker than usual, car headlights were blinding my vision, and then it seemed I didn’t even remember the Western Avenue route again… all I could think was “how did I get here”??? I tried to phone a friend for directions but alas, network failure!!! At this point I knew I had entered one chance!
Then it happened…I saw a road sign. It occurred to me the road signs could guide me home and straight to the island also, instead of doing the long route, so I followed the sign and kept going. I saw a 2nd road sign, and then a 3rd one. I kept following the signs and before I knew it I had climbed a familiar bridge…the rest as we say is history. I got home safe and in quick time. I was elated, felt like I’d just achieved some award winning feat.
As I kept thinking about the trip I realized this is how God leads me, or at least tries to lead me (When I recognize and follow). He gives me the signs, the pointers which are all around, but why do I miss it so, much? Maybe because;
·         I am not looking out for it?
·         I am too distracted by my own feeling of inadequacy and ignorance of such a simple road.
·         I decide to trust in man and seek mans direction?
·         I have a plan B, C and D?
So what turned out to be finding the way home also became a learning experience and I would share below some things I  learnt from this, also using some scriptures that occurred to me;
1.      God is always leading us, the signs are always there; Isaiah 42:16 (Though you have not done that kind of thing before, its new, it’s strange for you, its unfamiliar territory, a new Job, relationship, adventure etc).
2.     We need to pay attention, look out for the signs; Habakkuk 2:1, Matt 26:41 says Watch and Pray . We need to pay attention, we need to be alert, observant, like Habakkuk said I will stand to SEE what He will say.  Let’s pray for the Grace to see and recognize the signs.
3.     The signs don’t come all at once; Isaiah 28:10. Just like the road signs, I saw the 1st one, followed it till I saw the second and then kept going. Sometimes the challenge is we want to see the end from the beginning, that’s for God Isaiah 46:10. For us we follow step by step, just like Abraham did Genesis 12:1.
4.     There’s always a tendency to trust more in man than God; 1st Kings 13 1-24. I find this story very instructional, please read and learn from it. Just like I was tempted to phone a friend whom I wasn’t even sure knew the way, yes he might have helped but in this case there were clear road signs to guide me. (I am not saying do not get advice from or listen to man, no there’s also a place for that.) But in some cases God has shown us the way in all clarity, He’s given the sign. Don’t try to seek validation, or support from man. When God shows you so it is!!! Our relationship with God is a very private affair.
5.     Gods way always turns out perfect; Jeremiah 29:11. Following God you can never miss it. Just Trust and Obey!
It is my prayer that this year we make Loving and Seeking God our NO 1 priority. Let us realise it is God or nothing. Let us learn to walk with Him. Let us daily ask Him for wisdom, that He may open our eyes that we SEE. That we recognize the signs He has put in place and pray for the Grace to follow the signs. God is for us this year, He loves us with an everlasting love. Let us open out lives to Him like never before and experience Him afresh.
God Bless us All.
TyFajj
 
 

Wednesday, 31 July 2013

HOW DO YOU SEE YOURSELF???



I saw this video and it touched me.
You are more beautiful, talented, creative, blessed, and favoured than you think you are. Accept yourself, Love yourself, Laugh more, Live free. BE YOU.

Have a productive, fruitful and Love filled August!!!

Plenty Love
TyF

Sunday, 7 July 2013

My 'Slum2School' Experience

I came across a very inspiring young man called Otto Orondaam. I had heard about him and his work in the Makoko community in Lagos, Nigeria. Otto started a project to get children, who live in slum  and cannot afford to go to school, access to education. In just a year he and his amazing team of volunteers have sent more than 320 children to school so that this children can have a promising future.

His story amazes me. He came to Lagos in 2011 to serve (NYSC) and was posted to a bank (that's everybodys dream during service year). He however noticed a community everytime he went across the 3rd mainland bridge. he would see canoes, smoke in the air, houses on stilts etc. Curiosity got the better part of him and then Otto decided to pay Makoko a visit. The visit turned out to be not what he expected. The beautiful scene from the bridge was an unpleasant scene close up.

Makoko was not the reality he expected. It was a slum like no other, and he found thousands of children who were not going to school and could not even afford it. Otto immediately knew what he wanted to do. He approached NYSC to inform them that he would like to quit his bank job and start a project in Makoko. This was unheard of,  but after they realized he was serious, he was allowed to quit the job, and that began the slum2school dream. After he completed his NYSC in 2012, he was awarded the best Corper in Lagos state. He also received the Future Award for Innovator of the Year in Education.


Today the impact of slum2school in Makoko cannot be overemphasized. I had to go and see for myself and I was amazed. They have sent about 320 children to school. They pay their school fees, buy them uniforms and other school items the children need. The S2S team visits the community 3 times a week for after school classes. They also organizes various programmes for them to ensure that these children are learning and remain committed. This is very impressive work.
The Slum2School team is made up of young passionate, committed individuals who give of themselves, their time, their energy and effort to see that this work continues and goes stronger.


This year Slum2School has raised their goal. They want to send 1000 Children to school in December from the Makoko community and other communities around Lagos. They seek to raise N30million  and they need you support.


If you would like to support this worthy initiative please visit www.slum2school.org for more information.

Be the change you seek. #Volunteer.

TyF.

Thursday, 4 July 2013

Lessons on life from India Arie

Wow, it's certainly been a while since I blogged. I guess the busyness of life took over and even when I remember or have inspiration to write, before I can get down to it, another activity takes over.
But now I know its time to start sharing my thoughts again:-)
I'm gonna jump start this by an article I came across written by India Arie. Here she talks about 10 things she learned this decade. 
Written in a  simple and honestly format, I found this article very profound. I hope this blesses and inspires you.

 My next post coming up is on lessons I learnt overcoming Offence...You sure want to read this...COMING SOON:-)

The 10 most important things I have learned this decade

(January 1, 2011)
 
This New Years, I am reflecting not on the end of a year but the end of a decade, The morning of December 31, 2010, laying in the bed I was thinking about these things and decided to write it down – which I do most things… I decided to share this one  …. Here it is …. 
 
The 10 most important lessons of the Decade 
1. In the last 10 years, I’ve lent major amounts of money to 10 people, 7 of those 10 people, have not  paid me back, and the 3 who paid me back, were employees.
The Lesson: To paraphrase yoda : Lend not , either give or don’t give..
 
2. Between 2002 and 2004 (roughly) I was in a bad relationship. 2 years later in a very random moment on a Flight to South Africa realized that relationship was ACTUALLY emotionally abusive. To this day I have flash backs of what I SHOULD have SAID (or done) in certain instances, kind of like Post Traumatic Stress of the Heart.
The Lesson: there is a very fine line between a bad relationship and an emotionally abusive one, peace at ALL cost isn’t peace at all. Always be your self, if your significant other is treating you in ways you would advise your friends not to tolerate, change your situation.
 
3. People ask me often, how I felt about the Grammy’s of 2002, where I was nominated for 7 Grammy’s and ultimately shut out. I said everything from; I was un fair and it hurt me, TO I am glad it happened that way it taught me a lot and gave my star room to rise. In this past Decade I’ve realized, that spiritually, I can ONLY get what I am READY and OPEN for. I wanted the attention but I was Afraid of all of the attention. I was so scared by all of those Grammy nomination that I had chest pains, I wanted to win but I was afraid of the responsibility of it, and I found every subconscious way to make sure I didn’t win. OFCOURSE it was ALSO, all very political, the opposing business team CRUSHED MY business team, …. But in the end I won a place in the HEARTS of millions and over the next decade, I went on to create 3 more albums all while standing somewhat still.  What I mean is, I didn’t grow too much, or too little, I didn’t make TOO many new fans but I didn’t loose any, and TO THIS DAY people talk about how I SHOULD have won. In hindsight I realize that I DID win, and I could have leveraged THAT very public shut out into a MAJOR career win, I just didn’t WANT to, I was afraid.
LESSON: when you’re scared of Failure and scared of success, standing still is the only option left – only you can choose which one.
 
4. This decade my BIGGEST lesson has been speaking my truth even when I’ afraid. I went from a very earthy, poetic hearted, sensitive art student young adult in my thrift store dresses and riding my bike playing guitar under the trees …. To being a VERY small fish in a HUGE ocean, prayed upon by Blue blooded corporate SHARKS!  And INSTANTLY, I had to say things like “do what you said you are going to do! … to the CEO of Motown, or “My Band NEEDS to be taken care of “  OH!  How bout this one: “ THIS PERSONS NAME, NEEDS to be on the back of my album SHE is the TRUE executive producer ”  TO THE CFO OF UNIVERSAL MUSIC GROUP.  And EVERY time I had to have a confrontation I would be sweating DOWN my armpits and heart racing really genuinely AFRAID, of what I’m not SURE, of stepping out of my comfort zone, FOR SURE.  I used to see this scary thing that came into my life, as a burden that wasn’t meant to be, but I realize now I was but in the water with the sharks to learn to fend for myself, to navigate the world…. MY WEAPON? Prayer and my spiritual grounding. I do things like wear white on my head during those meetings, I pray about what to say before hand and meditate on it. I ask God to cover and protect my heart that I would speak my truth with love and not become hardened by ANY confrontation…. Simple things, and they work for me. I’ve come a LONG way in being able to speak for myself, and still a long way to go.
THE LESSON: to paraphrase the Yoruba proverb: Through prayer, there is a bigger FISH waiting to eat the BIG fish that’s trying to eat you.
 
5. My MOTHER and I ….. my mother and I , what can I say.  During this decade we went from Being a conventional Mother and daughter. To a more symbiotic relationship. She still the mom and gets to win every debate, but we DO DEBATE.  And while my career has brought LOTS of lessons for me, it’s also brought LOTS OF LESSONS FOR HER.  My mother was ALSO a singer, and the small upstart label Motown wanted to sign her as a Teenager. She decided not to do and regretted it all her life. NOW here I am 23 years old signing with Motown. I didn’t consciously do it for her, but subconsciously for sure I did. I’m certain of this. And during this decade I’ve seen my mother act in way I didn’t recognize. Growing up my mother was the STORNGEST WOMAN ON THE PLANET. PERIOD. She paid the bills owned a business and raised 2 children, pretty much alone… but during this decade, I was able to free her form THOSE responsibilities and she took on OTHER responsibilities of being a part of my CAREER TEAM. I watched my mother having emotional our bursts and being childish at times, doing things I found not only foreign but EXTREEEEEMLEY annoying… but we continued to work together because I needed her there,  to protect me, and hold me up when my back was weak. I quickly got clear that NO ONE, cared about me like she did in business or in the world in general and I needed her there… and I WANTED her there to experience my new HIGHS! ….  The alternative of not having her there, didn’t feel anything like right. My love for her called me to, get over the shock of her not being the STRONGEST PERSON IN THE WORLD, to find a way to really SEE the REASONS behind why she would sometimes act the way she does.
The Lesson: My mother is not just my MOTHER, she isnt PERFECT!, she is  HUMAN, she is  PERFECTLY HUMAN, and I have to honor and make room for that.
 
6. There have been A LOT of ups and downs, and I’m not sure when I signed up for such a tumultuous life. I’ve experienced VERY High HIGHS, and Very LOW, Lows.  And when I’m living in the in between I don’t know what to do with myself but SIT still somewhere and stare out the window, and that inevitably turns into analyzing my feelings… and writing … writing things like this. I always come back to the truth that I have lived many of my dreams, and things I could have never dreamed of. I always wanted to MEET Stevie Wonder, now I’ve not only MET him, but written 2 songs and recorded 2 songs with him. One that was the title cut for his first album in 10 years. Nominated for 2 Grammy’s with him, ( the Christmas song and a time to love)  won an NAACP award with him, become friends with him. I’ve Sang with James Taylor, Had Bill Withers in an audience at my show, been on Oprah 3 times, performed twice. I even got to meet and have a private conversation with Met Nelson Mandela.
I’ve been in 3 major relationships, one youthful one ( brown skin) one awful one (These eyes)  and one GREAT one ( He heals me) , and some interesting friendships in between a public relationship ( The Truth), a surprise one, (Beautiful surprise), Wait until your hear 6th Avenue -  LOL!  EVERY one of those relationships was a blessing.  I’ve gone from a starving artist to financially independent, shared the stage with Sting, Bette Midler, won 3 grammy, been nominated for 23 GRAMMYS! won NUMEROUS NAACP AWARDS, and a few BET awards,  I have the REGULAR EXPERIENCE of EVERYTIME I am in concert, the whole audience sings every word to every songs, and the person who made me see that clearly, was George Benson….  I’ve recorded with John Mellencamp, Cassandra Wilson, Julia Fordham, Sergio Mendes, Carlos Santana, Stevie Wonder, …  Herbie Hancock…. Smokey Robinson, most recently, Keb’mo I’ve even been written about in a book “ The Transformation” by Ainslie McLeod. And more and more and more …..I could go on and on and that’s the point.
The Lesson: there is REAL power in Focusing on the Good. FOR REAL
 
7. I realize that in nurturing my career, that I didn’t have the energy to nurture ANYTHING ELSE! I didn’t nurture my friendships, my family relationships, there was a period of time in there where I wasn’t even nurturing my own health. Touring severely anemic, and wondering why I am tired ALL DAY EVERY DAY, struggling to just make it through the airport, and trying to pretend like I feel good when I get on television, much of the time not saying how I REALLY feel about things. At the turn of the decade, I feel accomplished, but emotionally poor in many ways.  Over the last 3 years I’ve worked harder to be better with my loved ones, and I am TRUYL thankful for the friends who are still HERE for me, and gracefully bowing out of all relationships that had to leave my life. I am now living in more balance, and moderation and that brings so much clarity
The Lesson to paraphrase the serenity prayer: Thank you God for granting me the clarity to Honor the relationships that i can not change, the Courage to Heal the relationships that I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference.
 
8. HINDSIGHT LOOMS LARGE at the turn of this decade. It is so easy for me to look back at the past and see my missteps, how I could have taken the other fork in the road and maybe be standing in a different spot than THIS ONE., what ever this one IS … struggling for my artistic integrity, afraid of something I have to do, firing an employee, being mistreated by an authority figure, feeling over looked, or under valued .. under paid.. whatever it is.  Hindsight doesn’t shows me how I could have kept this from happening … I realize NOW, that the real lesson that hindsight teaches, is that I DON’T have to be here AGAIN.
The lesson: its okay not to Know, exploration is how we grow
 
9. SUCCESS is subject to your OWN definition. I had MANY people around me over the years who had DREAMS FOR me, I thought that meant they cared, and I’m sure they did, but I NOW understand that their dreams for me where inextricably tied to their OWN dreams of what THEY could ACHIEVE THROUGH me.  I got to a place where I was working EVERYDAY, my very life energy was to fulfill someone else’s dreams for my life – slave to someone else’s agenda. The music industry is TOO HARD, the travel ALONE! and the energy out put is SO MUCH, TOO MUCH to be doing it for someone else’s reasons …..  That used to REALLY hurt me, but I understand now, that its human nature, and as it should be, We ALL have our own agendas and missions in life.  Instead of spending so much energy on being HURT, I need to pay attention to MY agenda. Honor my dreams, honor my LIFE, define my mission and  run my own race. About a year ago I promised myself, to take the reigns of my life. During this year of self- analyses, I realized that I was COMPLETELY UN EMPOWERED, and contrary to what I always felt,  NO ONE USURPED MY POWER, I GAVE it away, FOR FEAR THAT I WOULDN’T BE ABLE TO MANAGE MY OWN LIFE.  I realize now that I lived a VERY sheltered life, which I am thankful for, but it left me with out the tools to navigate this world I walked into 10 years ago. The last 10 years has been an education in how the world IS, and now I am ready to create the PERSONAL world I desire. It is from that place of EMPOWERMENT, that for the FIRST TIME  I GET CLEAR ON MY DEFINITION OF SUCCESS:
 
THE LESSON:  Success for ME is CLARITY of my intention*, and reaching that intention while being true to myself.
 
10. My Intention: To spread love, healing, peace, and joy, through the POWER OF WORDS AND MUSIC. To be a living example of acceptance, honoring of cultural diversity, the interconnectedness of humankind, the elevation of consciousness of humanity, and above all else, to be an example of the truth that LOVE WINS, And to do it all while being TRUE TO MY SELF. 
In the end, after this completely unexpected experience of fame … 
 
The Lesson: No matter what anybody says, what matters MOST is what you think of your self
 
With love, Strength, Courage and Wisdom
INDIA.ARIE

Monday, 14 May 2012

Is this really what we have become???

Something seems to have changed over the last 2 weeks, and I know it’s not just me feeling it. After the Boko Haram bomb threat broadcast went viral on blackberry messenger, it seems everyone has been on their toes wondering when, where and what will hit. God forbid that it does though.
But the changes are as far reaching as they are dramatic. I was at the Galleria with friends last week and at the entrance we were confronted by the kind of security checks that one reads about in the middle east (just joking, it wasn’t that major)…I thought, wow is this really happening to us? And then a friend told me a story of how in her church on a Sunday morning some guy walked in, dropped a bag and walked out. Everyone seated in that row who saw him, stood up and walked out of the church (They didn’t report this to anyone before leaving, and I thought that was cruel of them. If it really turned out to be a bomb, couldn’t they have silently informed an usher and afterward, turned and run? But I don’t blame them, nobody wan die abi?). When the ushers noticed what happened they went to the seat and found the bag there. They later found out the bag owner had only gone to the bathroom.
But this is the kind of paranoia we seem to be living with.  Nowhere is safe anymore and everyone is looking over their shoulder praying nothing happens.
I’ve been a victim of this too, though I must admit I am generally paranoid. On two occasions I’ve almost had the cause to shout bomb and run out of a building (well I’m sure it wouldn’t have been that dramatic).
Last week I was in a building in Yaba area and some guy walks in with a bag looking very suspicious (well I thought he did). He looked nervous and cast furtive glances to his right and left and it was then I thought OMG…is this one of them?! To make matters worse, he came and stood right beside me. At this point I was sure I would pass out. He then opens the bag and reaches into it, searching; and then I see a wire sticking out. Yes, you can imagine how I felt. But just before I hit hysteria lane, , I saw what turned out to be a phone charger and the man was only looking for a wall socket to charge his phone. PHEW…. Sweet relief washed over me, but also alarm at the panic I had just felt. What was wrong with me I wondered?
Today, I headed to Ajose Adeogun on another errand.. At the front desk was a guy who wanted to deliver 2 flower vases to the MD’s office. But the security didn’t want to let him through… Why? He had no I.D but insisted that he was a regular at the office and some of the guards knew him.
I looked at him, then at the flowers, and made a quick mental calculation: Unidentified man + Flower vase (that looked like a good hiding place for a bomb!)+ MD.s office….hmmmm seems like something is about to go down…. (Yes I know I’ve seen too many Mission Impossible-type films).  I figured if I was on a certain floor and MD’s office was all the way up, an explosion won’t affect me right??? (Yeah I guess you’re thinking what kinda crazy thought is that). Apologies, my wild imagination at work. Well I was there for 2 hours, and no explosion so I guess the guy was truly just a flower delivery boy
But all this just keeps me wondering, for how long will this BH, Bomb matter continue? Now things are seemingly calm; but is this the lull before the storm? Are we simply waiting for another explosion somewhere in the North (which we would only shudder and shrug away in the hopes that it’ll never happen to us or someone we know. May it never come to Lagos o is always our prayer)?  What is the government really doing? What can they do? What is the solution to this nerve-racking insecurity in our nation?
Will we continue to live like this believing some day it will all just go away? Infact my question is how in the first place did we get here? Is this what we have become?

Monday, 16 April 2012

CLARITY


I remember when I was in school and the lecturer would say your communication must be “Concise” and “Clear”. Now more than ever the need for Clarity is “clear” to meJ. Clarity in terms of Vision, purpose and goals cannot be overemphasized. In my search I came across this article on www.stevepavlini.com. I found in very informative. Some new ideas and other old ideas re-enforced. It’s a long read but worth your while. Enjoy it.


The Power of Clarity
H.L. Hunt, a man who rose from a bankrupt cotton farmer in the 1930s to a multi-billionaire when he died in 1974, was once asked during a TV interview what advice he could give to others who wanted to be financially successful. He said only two things are required. First, you must decide exactly what it is you want to accomplish. Most people never do that in their entire lives. And secondly, you must determine what price you'll have to pay to get it, and then resolve to pay that price.

Clear Goals Are Essential
Clear goals and objectives are essential to the success of any business, and this is no less true of building your own career. If you don't take the time to get really clear about exactly what it is you're trying to accomplish, then you're forever doomed to spend your life achieving the goals of those who do. In the absence of a clear direction for your life, you will either meander aimlessly or you will build a career that you don't feel good about. You may make some money, and you may do some interesting work, but the end result will not resemble anything you ever made a conscious decision to build, and ultimately you will be left with the sinking feeling that maybe you took a wrong turn somewhere along the way. Do you ever look at your career and think to yourself, "How on earth did I get here?"

If setting goals is so critically important, then why is it that so few people take the time to define exactly where they want to go? Part of the reason is a lack of knowledge about how to set clear goals. You can go through years of schooling and never receive any instruction on goal setting at all. A failure to understand the immense importance of establishing clear goals is also common. But those who truly know what they want often outperform everyone else by an enormous degree.

A frequent deterrent to goal setting is the fear of making a mistake. Teddy Roosevelt once said, "In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing." Setting virtually any goal at all is better than drifting aimlessly with no clear direction. The best way I know to guarantee failure is to avoid making clear, committed decisions. Every day is already a mistake if you don't know where you're going. You're probably spending most of your time working to achieve other people's goals. The local fast food restaurant, TV advertisers, and the stockholders of the businesses you patronize are all very happy for that. If you don't decide what you really want, then you've decided to hand your future over to the whims of others, and that's always a mistake. By taking hold of the reins yourself and deciding where you'd like to go, you gain a tremendous sense of control that most people never experience in their entire lives.

Many people assume that because they have a direction, they must therefore have goals, but this is not the case and merely creates the illusion of progress. "Making more money" and "building a business" are not goals. A goal is a specific, clearly defined, measurable state. An example of the difference between a direction and a goal is the difference between the compass direction of northeast and the top of the Eiffel Tower in France. One is merely a direction; the other is a definite location.

 Define Goals in Binary Terms
One critical aspect of goals is that they must be defined in binary terms. At any point in time, if I were to ask you if you had achieved your goal yet, you must be able to give me a definitive "yes" or "no" answer; "maybe" is not an option. You cannot say with absolute certainty if you've fully completed the outcome of "making more money," but you can give me a definitive binary answer as to whether or not you are currently standing on top of the Eiffel Tower. An example of a clear business goal would be that your gross income for the month of April this year is $5000 or more. That is something you can calculate precisely, and at the end of the month, you can give a definitive answer as to whether or not your goal has been achieved. That is the level of clarity you need in order to form a goal that your mind can lock onto and move towards rapidly.

Be Detailed
Be as detailed as possible when setting goals. Give specific numbers, dates, and times. Make sure that each of your goals is measurable. Either you achieved it, or you didn't. Define your goals as if you already know what's going to happen. It's been said that the best way to predict the future is to create it.

 Commit Goals to Writing
Goals must be in writing in the form of positive, present-tense, personal affirmations. A goal that is not committed to writing is just a fantasy. Set goals for what you want, not for what you don't want. Your subconscious mind can lock onto a clearly defined goal only if the goal is defined in positive terms. If you put your focus on what you don't want instead of what you do, you're likely to attract exactly what it is you're trying to avoid. Phrase your goals as if they are already achieved. Instead of saying, "I will earn $30,000 this year," phrase it in the present tense: "I earn $30,000 this year." If you phrase your goals in future terms, you are sending a message to your subconscious mind to forever keep that outcome in the future, just beyond your grasp. Avoid wishy-washy words like "probably," "should," "could," "would," "might," or "may" when forming your goals. Such words foster doubt as to whether you can really achieve what you are after. And finally, make your goals personal. You cannot set goals for other people, such as, "A publisher will publish my software by the end of the year." Phrase it like this instead: "I sign a North American retail publishing contract this year that earns me at least $50,000 by the end of the year."

Objectify Subjective Goals
What if you need to set subjective goals, such as improving your own level of self-discipline? How do you phrase such goals in binary terms? To solve this problem, I use a rating scale of 1 to 10. For instance, if you want to improve your self-discipline, ask yourself on a scale of 1 to 10, how do you rate your current level of self-discipline? Then set a goal to achieve a certain specific rating by a certain date. This allows you to measure your progress and know with a high degree of certainty whether or not you've actually achieved your goal.

Goal Setting Is an Activity
Setting clear goals is not a passive act. It doesn't happen automatically. You must take direct conscious action in order to make it so. Everything counts, and nothing is neutral. You are either moving towards your goals, or you're moving away from them. If you do nothing or if you act without clarity, then you are almost certainly a victim of "being outgoaled." In other words you are spending your time working on other people's goals without even knowing it. You are happily working to enrich your landlord, other businesses, advertisers, stockholders, etc. Each day you spend working without a sense of clarity about where you're headed is a step backwards for you. If you don't actively tend your garden, then weeds will grow automatically. Weeds don't need to be watered or fertilized. They just grow by themselves in the absence of an attentive gardener. Similarly, in the absence of conscious and directed action on your part, your work and your life will automatically become full of weeds. You don't need to do anything at all to make this happen. And when you finally get around to taking a serious look at where you are and where you want to go, the first thing you'll have to do is pull out all those weeds.

Reading this article will do absolutely nothing for you unless you turn it into some form of physical action. The best thinking unfortunately gives you zero results. In reality, you won't even be paid a penny for your thoughts. You can have the most creative idea in the world, but ideas themselves are utterly worthless. You only get results from the physical actions you take, never for the ideas you have. In order to get any kind of tangible results at all, you must act on an idea. You must communicate it, build it, implement it, and make it real.

Clarity Is a Choice
If you've been running your career in an unfocused manner, just waking up each morning and seeing what happens, then it is absolutely crucial that you take the time to decide and write down exactly where it is you want to go. How much longer will you continue to climb the ladder of success, only to realize too late that it was leaning against the wrong building? Just pick a point in the future, whether it's six months from now or five years from now, and spend a few hours writing out a clear description of where you want to be at that time. I know many people who aren't sure where they want to go, so they avoid committing anything to writing in order to "keep their options open." What would happen if you pursued that attitude to its logical conclusion? If you always kept your options open and never made any firm commitments, then you'd never get promoted, start your own business, get married, have a family, move to that new home, etc. except to the degree that someone else made that decision for you.

I used to have a friend like this, who still hasn't decided what he wants to do with his life. He yields control of his life to others without even realizing it, simply because he's unwilling to take the time to define a vision for his own life out of fear of making the wrong choice. His life is ruled by others who push their goals onto him, which he accepts by default. Ask yourself if you're in the same boat. If a friend of yours became totally committed to getting you to change something in your life at random -- your career, your living situation, your relationship, etc. -- could s/he do it just by being absolutely certain and committed that it's the right thing for you? Could a business associate come along and radically alter your plans for the week without you ever deciding consciously that such a change is consistent with your goals? We all suffer from problems like these to the degree that we fail to set clear goals for ourselves. There is a big difference between recognizing and acting on a true opportunity and being knocked off course without making a conscious decision to shift gears.

Waiting for something to inspire you and hoping that the perfect outcome will just fall into your lap is nothing but a fantasy. Clear decision making doesn't happen passively; you actually have to physically put in the time to make it happen. If you don't have clear goals simply because you don't know what you want, then sit down and actively decide what you want. That sense of knowing what you want isn't going to just come to you in a form of divine inspiration. Clarity is a choice, not an accident or a gift. Clarity doesn't come to you -- you have to go to it. Not setting goals is the same thing as deciding to be a slave to the goals of others.

Clear Goals Sharpen Present-Moment Decisions
Your reality will not match your vision exactly. That's not the point. The point is for your vision to allow you to make clear daily decisions that keep you moving in the direction of your goals. When a commercial airliner flies from one city to another, it is off course over 90% of the time, but it keeps measuring its progress and adjusting its heading again and again. Goal setting works the same way. Maintain a clear list of goals not because that's actually where you'll end up but because it will give with tremendous certainty in deciding what you need to do today. When someone contacts you with an "opportunity" out of the blue, you'll know whether it's a real opportunity or a waste of time. The long view sharpens the short view.

As you begin moving towards your goals, you'll gain new knowledge along the way, and you'll have to adapt your plans as you go. You may also change your vision if you get partway there and decide it's not quite what you really want. Ill-formed goals are still far superior to no goals at all.

I was once told by someone that I should end each day by crossing it off my calendar and saying out loud, "There goes another day of my life, never to return again." Try this for yourself, and notice how much it sharpens your focus. When you end a day with the feeling that you would have lived it the same if you had the chance to repeat it, you gain a sense of gratitude that helps you focus on what's really important to you. When you end the day with a feeling of regret or loss, you gain the awareness to try a different approach the next day.

You'll see a measurable difference in your life the very first day you establish clear, committed goals, even if your first few attempts aren't perfect. You'll be able to make decisions much more rapidly because you'll see how they'll either move you towards or away from your goals. On the eve of his death, Walt Disney had a reporter crawl into bed with him so he could share his vision for Disney World, six years before its completion. When Disney World finally opened, another reporter commented to Walt's brother, Roy, "It's too bad Walt did not live to see this." Roy replied, "Walt saw it first. That’s why we are seeing it now." Clear goals allow you to achieve the first half of H.L. Hunt's success formula. By deciding exactly what you want to accomplish, committing it to writing, and reviewing it on a daily basis, you bring your goals into reality with the power of your focus.

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TyF